IA deployments affect the family much differently than a typical ship deployment for a few different reasons, primarily because it is just the service member deploying by him/her self rather than with a whole unit or ship. This may make the service member and their families feel isolated. There is not as much support for the family left behind as there would be if a whole ship were deploying; however; many commands are working on fixing this issue by initiating Family Support Groups and other means of assistance. These deployments are also more difficult because notification of the deployment is typically short notice and the deployments tend to be longer than conventional shipboard deployments. Lastly, the most difficult part of an IA deployment is dealing with the element of danger that is not usually associated with a shipboard deployment.
I can tell you first hand that all of these things are true. When we transferred to Naval Station Great Lakes for shore duty it never once crossed my mind that Rick would be deployed to Iraq. I was so excited to be moving near my family in Wisconsin and to have Rick home with me for three straight years. When we transferred to Great Lakes, my biggest concern was selling our home in Mayport, FL, but that is a whole different blog post! To make that long story short, we ended up living apart for six months until a friend offered to rent the house from us. We were finally able to move in together and be a family again in April of 2007, but two months later Rick's command got the call that they needed to supply a name for a possible IA billet. Rick and one other chief were the only two at his command qualified to fill the billet, so we discussed it, and after shedding a lot of tears (me, not Rick) we agreed that he should go ahead and volunteer.
After he volunteered, we were just waiting to find out if he would be chosen to go and when. A couple days later, Rick was told that they had selected someone from a different command to go. I was so incredibly relieved! Unfortunately, that wasn't the last we would be hearing about it. Two weeks later they got a call that the other person ended up not being qualified, so Rick was now the IA. Oh the heartache! After being told that he was in the clear only two weeks earlier, the change in plans was a hard pill to swallow. We didn't have much time before he was due to deploy though, so I had to put on my big girl panties and make the best of the month and a half we had left together. We celebrated our son's first birthday, made a trip to Florida so he could see all of his friends and family, and then he was off to training with the Army.
He trained with the Army for one week in Virginia, one week in Maryland, and two weeks in South Carolina. He wasn't able to come home before he deployed, but thankfully I was able to fly to South Carolina to see him for a day and a half right before he headed out to the Middle East. I was so greatful to be able to see him one last time! I just had so much uncertainty in my head with him deploying to Iraq, so being able to see him before he left was wonderful.
In the nine months that followed there were a lot of ups and downs. He ended up being stationed at FOB Marez in Mosul, Iraq. His job was to run a shop that repaired jamming devices. During the first half of the deployment I couldn't bear to watch the news because there was never any good news about Iraq. The first time I tried to watch the news there was a report about how Mosul was becoming the most violent city in Iraq, and five soldiers had died there that day, so that was a big mistake. After a while though I had to give in and watch the news because I was uninformed on the presidential race.
While he was deployed, I felt pretty alone. I made great friends, and my family was nearby for support, but I was one of very few wives left behind. It wasn't like a ship deployment where there are a whole shipload of wives in the same boat as you. Everyone was busy enjoying family time with their husbands and kids on the weekends. As luck would have it, it was the snowiest winter on record in Illinois, so I spent a lot of time shoveling, which had to wait until nap time since my then one year old son hate being outside in the cold. Rick's command never checked on me to see how I was doing, not even after a massive snow storm blew threw. It was a really difficult time.
I managed to keep as busy as possible with online classes. I ended up earning my associate's degree, with high honors, in December. We attended play dates during the week and Ethan was in swimming lessons at the base pool. I started putting a lot of time into my Cafepress store. I compiled all of the IA support information I could to try to help other spouses about to face the same situation I was in. Staying busy is absolutely the key to making the time your spouse is deployed go faster.
The best thing that came out of the deployment was that Rick made LDO, limited duty officer. So, he would be commissioned the next year. That was incredibly exciting news, especially since it was the first time he had submitted a package.
Rick returned home to a made-over wife and almost 2 year old son on June 29th, 2008. It was one of the most exciting days of our lives. I don't think we had ever been happier to see each other! Ethan went almost the whole second year of his life without his daddy, but thanks to our flat daddy and the daddy book I made for him, I'm pretty sure he recognized Rick. He was really shy at first, but he warmed up to him pretty quick. It was wonderful to have our family complete again. My parents and my brother were here for the big day as well.
Here are some photos from the homecoming:
While he was deployed, I felt pretty alone. I made great friends, and my family was nearby for support, but I was one of very few wives left behind. It wasn't like a ship deployment where there are a whole shipload of wives in the same boat as you. Everyone was busy enjoying family time with their husbands and kids on the weekends. As luck would have it, it was the snowiest winter on record in Illinois, so I spent a lot of time shoveling, which had to wait until nap time since my then one year old son hate being outside in the cold. Rick's command never checked on me to see how I was doing, not even after a massive snow storm blew threw. It was a really difficult time.
I managed to keep as busy as possible with online classes. I ended up earning my associate's degree, with high honors, in December. We attended play dates during the week and Ethan was in swimming lessons at the base pool. I started putting a lot of time into my Cafepress store. I compiled all of the IA support information I could to try to help other spouses about to face the same situation I was in. Staying busy is absolutely the key to making the time your spouse is deployed go faster.
The best thing that came out of the deployment was that Rick made LDO, limited duty officer. So, he would be commissioned the next year. That was incredibly exciting news, especially since it was the first time he had submitted a package.
Rick returned home to a made-over wife and almost 2 year old son on June 29th, 2008. It was one of the most exciting days of our lives. I don't think we had ever been happier to see each other! Ethan went almost the whole second year of his life without his daddy, but thanks to our flat daddy and the daddy book I made for him, I'm pretty sure he recognized Rick. He was really shy at first, but he warmed up to him pretty quick. It was wonderful to have our family complete again. My parents and my brother were here for the big day as well.
Here are some photos from the homecoming:
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